This happens on a bad day ...

One fine day two friends a Constant and e^x are walking down an alley and see a derivative operator walking from the other end.

Constant : Oh, I should run for my life as he will reduce me to nothing.
[saying this he runs away]

e^x : Well, I have nothing to worry about!

And he walks to the derivative and says...

Hi, I am e^x

Derivative : Nice to meet you, I am d/dy.

The Last Autumn Leaf

Those were the times
when you looked at Me,
and then you smiled
for the last you could see.

What kept you from falling?
I was waiting,
Waiting for a new horizon
the birth of another spring.

And the last hold on your branch
the last moments at your death,
was like holding eternity
in My very own breath.

Those were the moments of truth
the moments of life,
the moments of grief
yet the desire was all Mine.

You still looked at Me
and smiled at My death,
for there I lay, seeing you
holding My last breath.

Then I realized
that the smile was only Mine,
as I knew
that I too shall have to die.

In those last moments
I could see a New Horizon,
the deep red sky
and the fire again.

And then you fell to the ground
to give birth to The New Spring,
as you are
The Last Autumn Leaf.

And I was born again ...

~ Suprabhat

Hum hue Paagal

Things don’t get worse on a beautiful Sunday evening when you decide to watch one of the latest comedy flicks in town. Things could have been better still had you left the theatre half way through. It’s a big disappointment to watch the Akshay, Paresh, Suneil and Vikram Bhatt combo Deewane Hue Paagal after the earlier likeable version Awaara Paagal Deewana. This one stands no where near the earlier, though an honest but over the board attempt was made to replicate.

The story begins with Vivek Oberoi as the “sutradhar” who is supposed to walk you through the movie but after a quarter vanishes into thin air. The character and quality of a movie can almost be judged in the first 15 min and vivek did a good job in letting the audience judge it, with a poorly rhymed narration!! There are times when a storyline as thin as a wafer survives with the handling of the theme and giving it a respectable comic character. These are the movies you know has a complete absurd base and stupidity deep in the core but emerges as a success, much of it depending on the way it is controlled with a good mix of humour, acting nuances and above all the script. DHP though has a fair mix of all but falters and is still a let down.

The script of DHP though has its moments but most of the time drags. The dialogues/monologues (Neeraj Vora and Abbas Hirapurwala) of the film seems to have been written first with an assortment of jokes from here and there and then fitted like a jigsaw puzzle to complete the movie. The director/writer seems to be obsessed with the fact that it a comedy and each line of the script should be responded from the audience with a laugh. However, the writer makes an honest and commendable attempt to keep the humour verbal without any obscene overtone (which is seen often in movies offlate and the audience seem to enjoy it) and not go into tickled laughter like one slipping over a banana. The scenes of the dog riot on shahid, suniel trying to pick up the paper and the way he drags around and the quintessential stunts at the end could have been done away with. The stunts though shot well are not in sync with the movie and sit up straight at your face towards the end.

The film has its moments though and many of them through the 3 hours. Akshay carries most of the movie on himself. It is rare to see an actor perform the same character in 5 different movies and still do so convincingly with complete ease and finesse. The director knows this and capitalizes well. The second half sees more of Paresh. I do not understand the fixated approach of every director in drawing his role. His roles have been replicated so much so that he now looks to be intentionally asinine through no fault of his own. It is high time he stops playing these and let the glory of “hera pheri” or “hungama” rest in peace. Suneil works honestly but below standards. The least spoken of Shahid the better. Johnny lever has his moments but is sidelined. Wasted are the talents of Om Puri, Supriya and Asrani (why was he in the frame fails me). Om Puri would have done better with a bigger chunk of the pie. Small roles in the movie by Suresh Menon (Veerappan) and Akshay’s assistant “Dubey ji” (I forget his name) are good and have been casted well. Rimii Sen has a photogenic smile which again the director capitalizes well and has the entire lot of men swooning. Other than this (she is supposed to be the essence of the movie with the plot rotating around her) she is only a dancing doll with the wierdest of attires all through the movie.

Anu Malick is self obsessed at his best lending his voice in most of the songs. Gawd!! When will he ever compose a song for himself with a triffle variation in his voice modulation and devoid of the tumbuktoo kind of lyrics. Spare us Anu. All the songs are out of place and the least melodious.

The movie has a vast repertoire of actors and Vikram bhatt has done a good job though in holding them all together till the very end and doing justice to “most” of them.

If you want a peaceful weekend eve and not get into a chaotic state of mind for a better part of 3 hrs, try and avoid the movie. If however you are a die hard fan of Akshay and Paresh and can tolerate the rest of the gang take your chances.

My Rating: 1.5/5

An ode to the legendary RC

For those who haven’t heard of the legendary Raju Chacha or haven’t had a taste of his dishes, here goes.

He is the latest DJ (Dish Jockey) sensation of the town. For all the fans of DJ Akeel and the likes, Raju Chacha aka DJ RC, will force you to disregard all that inane stuff. He can remix anything and everything in the refrigerator, be it bhindi with beans, chicken with coconut or haldi toppings on the everyday omlette, you name it. The subcontinental cuisine at its best.

Heard of “songs on demand” or “music on call”? Get ready now for “food on demand”. You suggest the dish and leave the rest to his consummate hands. In no time will you have your fav dish served out hot, garnished and all that. He is a believer of consistency and has a fixed masala base for all the dishes (So you have the same “good” taste in all his preparations, be it chole, baingan, rajma or chicken). How noble.

His funky language will make you dance to his tunes and a German go limp with shame and guilt on his usage of tense.
RC: “Main kal aaya tha na.” -> Meaning I will be coming tomorrow!
(I am learning these nuances to keep up to his skills, easier was learning the German grammar ... I come)

RC also has a great foresight and is precocious enough to know what will be asked of him next.
Varun: RC, aaj sabji nahi banayi aapne ?
RC : Sir, aata khatam ho gaya. Main kal laya tha na.
[See ... he knows what is coming next]

His innovation with instruments is commendable to say the least. The other day he used a cloth hanger (So what if it was old and rusted) to make a “chalni” to drain out puris from a deep frying pan. Now that is simply WOW!!! Ever heard of this concept before? Makes an engineer shy away.

Bet you will forget Domino’s if you had a taste of his omlettes. Where else would you find toppings of tomato, onion, dhania leaves and haldi? He can do a chicken topping also on your omlette(on demand).

RC has been getting lucrative offers form all quarters of the town, in star hotels and high end restaurants but is keeping with us for old times sake(lucky us). Driven by values.

All this and still more, words defy me when I describe to you the legendary RC!

Hail Raju Chacha!!!
[He who serves is the greatest soul]

Hummmm rahen ya na rahen ... yaad ayaa tha na ye pal ...